Post by Emarcee on Dec 8, 2017 17:49:37 GMT
DISCLAIMER: This news-article spoof, much like the previous one, uses exaggerated language when discussing the topic at hand, and no offense is meant to the LEGO Group, its legal department, the Chinese, the Chinese government, or Chinese toy imitators. However, just because no offense is intended does not mean the author condones the copyright infringement in question either. That said, please enjoy this spoof.
The LEGO group, after carefully and strategically placing an office building and several factories in China, has finally been able to coax a favorable decision out of China Shantou Intermediate People’s Court in September holding that certain BELA products infringed upon the copyrights of the LEGO Group and that manufacturing and selling of those products constituted acts of unfair competition. This marks a momentous day in history, as it is the first legal case involving copyright that the LEGO Group has ever won in China. Following this momentous decision, Peter Thorslund Kjær, Vice President, Legal Affairs in the LEGO Group, had this to say: "Well, you know: we rubbed some elbows with the judges. Forked over some yuan. Gave them a massage or two -- they eventually decided that they liked us enough to actually protect our corporate interests in the Chinese market. They're sending the same squads that usually confiscate Bibles so that they can confiscate the stolen packaging and toys from those two companies we wanted gone, and I assume quite a lot of people will be getting angrily shouted at in Chinese. Good times! Nothing quite like robbing the livelihood of people who knock-off your multi-billion dollar business, am I right? Am I right or am I right?"
The ruling is scheduled for November 2017 (a month ago). In preparation for this, in their spare work time the Chinese Confiscation Squad or "C.C.S" are practicing violently opening and closing desks, drawers, and breaking-and-entering so that they will be prepared for when they actually violently open and close desks, drawers, and break-and-enter into the houses of those responsible for selling the knock-off toys. They are also studying the composition of 3D printers so they can figure out what size truncheons they should use for when they inevitably and brutally destroy the somewhat-expensive equipment used to copy the knock-off LEGO bricks. When interviewed, "Bob" Wong of the C.C.S said, (roughly translated), "We are extremely looking forward to be engaging the ripping away of illegally copied LEGO products, and if we have as much fun doing it as when we confiscate Bibles, we might be convincing the courts to be letting us do it again in the future." When asked what he was most looking forward to in the up-coming confiscation of knock-off LEGOs, Bob said, "We cannot be waiting to be seeing the looks on the faces when we break the three dimension printers belonging to the companies. Fun and glory are awaiting us."
The LEGO Group takes the protection of its intellectual property very, very seriously and takes the necessary steps to ensure that its copyrights, trademarks, patents or intellectual properties are not being violated.
The LEGO group, after carefully and strategically placing an office building and several factories in China, has finally been able to coax a favorable decision out of China Shantou Intermediate People’s Court in September holding that certain BELA products infringed upon the copyrights of the LEGO Group and that manufacturing and selling of those products constituted acts of unfair competition. This marks a momentous day in history, as it is the first legal case involving copyright that the LEGO Group has ever won in China. Following this momentous decision, Peter Thorslund Kjær, Vice President, Legal Affairs in the LEGO Group, had this to say: "Well, you know: we rubbed some elbows with the judges. Forked over some yuan. Gave them a massage or two -- they eventually decided that they liked us enough to actually protect our corporate interests in the Chinese market. They're sending the same squads that usually confiscate Bibles so that they can confiscate the stolen packaging and toys from those two companies we wanted gone, and I assume quite a lot of people will be getting angrily shouted at in Chinese. Good times! Nothing quite like robbing the livelihood of people who knock-off your multi-billion dollar business, am I right? Am I right or am I right?"
The ruling is scheduled for November 2017 (a month ago). In preparation for this, in their spare work time the Chinese Confiscation Squad or "C.C.S" are practicing violently opening and closing desks, drawers, and breaking-and-entering so that they will be prepared for when they actually violently open and close desks, drawers, and break-and-enter into the houses of those responsible for selling the knock-off toys. They are also studying the composition of 3D printers so they can figure out what size truncheons they should use for when they inevitably and brutally destroy the somewhat-expensive equipment used to copy the knock-off LEGO bricks. When interviewed, "Bob" Wong of the C.C.S said, (roughly translated), "We are extremely looking forward to be engaging the ripping away of illegally copied LEGO products, and if we have as much fun doing it as when we confiscate Bibles, we might be convincing the courts to be letting us do it again in the future." When asked what he was most looking forward to in the up-coming confiscation of knock-off LEGOs, Bob said, "We cannot be waiting to be seeing the looks on the faces when we break the three dimension printers belonging to the companies. Fun and glory are awaiting us."
The LEGO Group takes the protection of its intellectual property very, very seriously and takes the necessary steps to ensure that its copyrights, trademarks, patents or intellectual properties are not being violated.
BY THE POWER OF THE WAFFLE IRON!!!!
