Chima's Faithful Newspaper Where the facts are made up and the issues don't matter (JK)
Special edition: Civil War
Return of the news Shocked by the sudden outbreak of civil war? Fed up with the inaccurate and inactive Chima Public Broadcasting network? Desperate for reliable information?
Well, wait no longer! New Talon Industries is pleased to announce the return of The Raven Report, now with a brand new editorial team! Without further ado, dig right into this special bumber issue!
Attack on Lion City The Gryphon Galvaor, currently serving as King of those horrible and pesky Eagles, has assembled the combined forces of the Eagles, Phoenix and Wolves (now calling themselves "Primordium") and launched an all-out assault on Lion City. Primordium seem willing to achieve victory an any cost, even violating the Forever Rock Convention by attacking the Bat Embassy on Mt. Cavora!
The centre of Chima has now been swallowed into a gigantic battle for control of the Chi Falls, with Primordium locked in combat with a coalition of Gorillas, Leopards and Bears who have intervened to protect Cavora from this outrageous Eagle aggression.
Unconfirmed reports also indicate that the Sabretooth Tigers have joined in, somehow sneaking into the Chi Temple undetected and attacking the Lions from behind. We'll have updates from our Lion City Correspondent shortly.
Unichi-ers assemble! The Raven Report can reveal that the alliance called "Unichi", presently comprised of the Gorillas, Spiders, Scorpions, and Forgotten*, is currently marshalling its military strength. Our Outlands Correspondent, Rita Rawlflower, reports.
In one of the largest military gatherings in the Outlands since the Liberation of Black Fang Mountain, Unichi has assembled a massive army of Spiders, Scorpions. Forgotten and even some Gorillas. With an army of thousands that could march at any moments all of us wondering: where will Unichi go, and what do they want? ~Rita Rawlflower, The Raven Report.
*a disreputable group of outlaws and criminals from varuous tribes, including the dingbat Rica, tyricannical queen of the Wings Row Monarchy.
Continued on Page 2.
*Angry Rica Cawing here for the besmirching of her name*
Crocodiles see further regime change We can now confirm that Croc King and notable Primordium ally, Sobek, has been stripped of all rank and status and is currently on the run. Just as Sobek was leading the Crocs into battle against a Lion occupation, Queen Carina returned from the Outlands and exposed Sobek as a wanted criminal who took advantage of the other Crocs' ice-induced amnesia to seize power. Sobek was last seen fleeing towards the West Sea under police pursuit, while Queen Carina has lead a small army into the Artic Circle to rescue King Crogar from captivity in a Sabretooth dungeon.
Dozens dissappear across Chima We have had reports of Chimians from multiple tribes mysteriously vanishing. Last week we had reports of 1 Peackock, 2 Ravens and 12 Bears vanishing without a trace, and since then disappearances have only become more frequent. With tribal governments distracted by war, their citizens are worried about what's become of their neighbours: did they leave or were they abducted, and where are they now? Stay tuned for further updates in our next issue.
WRM dictatorship clings to power We regret to inform you that Rica, the once-usurped, once-abdicated, twice-returned autocrat who has lead the Raven Tribe ever since Director Radnar vanished under suspicious circumstances, remains in power.
Since the return of the Wings Row Monarchy, government popularity has plummeted amid economic downturn - official data from the Talon Indsutries Office of Statistical Affairs shows the stock market has yet to recover from the collapse in the value of Rawlin Street shares resulting from Raven entry into the Fire-Ice War. With the Queen's increasingly prolonged visit to the Minor Tribes only worsening her 78% disapproval rate in Ravenville, we're beginning to wonder: how long will the Ravens accept this undemocratic, bad-for-business, unpopular and antiquated mode of governance???
Thank you for reading the "Raven Report." Brought to you by New Talon Industries of the Raven Tribe.
LOL. Technically it's called the "New Razarian Monarchy" now. Maybe I should bring back Chima Public Broadcasting... someday... maybe.
(dutch)er is nieuw nieuws:er is een nieuwe alliantie genaamd het eagle triumvirate bestaande uit primordium,de bats,unichi,de kolonie en de EoB.ze hebben de leiders van de minor tribes al benadert en zijn momenteel bezig andere stoelpoten onder de leeuwen vandaan te zagen.we houden u op de hoogte over mogelijke toekomstige delegaties naar de raven
Chima's Faithful Newspaper Where the facts are made up and the issues don't matter (JK)
Special edition: Civil War
Return of the news Shocked by the sudden outbreak of civil war? Fed up with the inaccurate and inactive Chima Public Broadcasting network? Desperate for reliable information?
Well, wait no longer! New Talon Industries is pleased to announce the return of The Raven Report, now with a brand new editorial team! Without further ado, dig right into this special bumber issue!
Attack on Lion City The Gryphon Galvaor, currently serving as King of those horrible and pesky Eagles, has assembled the combined forces of the Eagles, Phoenix and Wolves (now calling themselves "Primordium") and launched an all-out assault on Lion City. Primordium seem willing to achieve victory an any cost, even violating the Forever Rock Convention by attacking the Bat Embassy on Mt. Cavora!
The centre of Chima has now been swallowed into a gigantic battle for control of the Chi Falls, with Primordium locked in combat with a coalition of Gorillas, Leopards and Bears who have intervened to protect Cavora from this outrageous Eagle aggression.
Unconfirmed reports also indicate that the Sabretooth Tigers have joined in, somehow sneaking into the Chi Temple undetected and attacking the Lions from behind. We'll have updates from our Lion City Correspondent shortly.
Unichi-ers assemble! The Raven Report can reveal that the alliance called "Unichi", presently comprised of the Gorillas, Spiders, Scorpions, and Forgotten*, is currently marshalling its military strength. Our Outlands Correspondent, Rita Rawlflower, reports. *a disreputable group of outlaws and criminals from varuous tribes, including the dingbat Rica, tyricannical queen of the Wings Row Monarchy.
Continued on Page 2.
*Angry Rica Cawing here for the besmirching of her name*
*One of the NTI journalists throws rotten fruit at her*
Crocodiles see further regime change We can now confirm that Croc King and notable Primordium ally, Sobek, has been stripped of all rank and status and is currently on the run. Just as Sobek was leading the Crocs into battle against a Lion occupation, Queen Carina returned from the Outlands and exposed Sobek as a wanted criminal who took advantage of the other Crocs' ice-induced amnesia to seize power. Sobek was last seen fleeing towards the West Sea under police pursuit, while Queen Carina has lead a small army into the Artic Circle to rescue King Crogar from captivity in a Sabretooth dungeon.
Dozens dissappear across Chima We have had reports of Chimians from multiple tribes mysteriously vanishing. Last week we had reports of 1 Peackock, 2 Ravens and 12 Bears vanishing without a trace, and since then disappearances have only become more frequent. With tribal governments distracted by war, their citizens are worried about what's become of their neighbours: did they leave or were they abducted, and where are they now? Stay tuned for further updates in our next issue.
WRM dictatorship clings to power We regret to inform you that Rica, the once-usurped, once-abdicated, twice-returned autocrat who has lead the Raven Tribe ever since Director Radnar vanished under suspicious circumstances, remains in power.
Since the return of the Wings Row Monarchy, government popularity has plummeted amid economic downturn - official data from the Talon Indsutries Office of Statistical Affairs shows the stock market has yet to recover from the collapse in the value of Rawlin Street shares resulting from Raven entry into the Fire-Ice War. With the Queen's increasingly prolonged visit to the Minor Tribes only worsening her 78% disapproval rate in Ravenville, we're beginning to wonder: how long will the Ravens accept this undemocratic, bad-for-business, unpopular and antiquated mode of governance???
Thank you for reading the "Raven Report." Brought to you by New Talon Industries of the Raven Tribe.
LOL. Technically it's called the "New Razarian Monarchy" now. Maybe I should bring back Chima Public Broadcasting... someday... maybe.
Oh, you should definitely; it'd be great to have both the news stations active again.
-last edited on May 24, 2022 16:00:46 GMT by Shamrock
Post by Shamrock on May 24, 2022 15:57:40 GMT
THE RAVEN REPORT: RATION YOUR CHI!
Chima's Faithful Newspaper Where the facts are made up and the issues don't matter
Sacred Pool emptied! In news that will undoubtedly shock all of Chima, our Lion City correspondent and multiple other eyewitnesses can confirm that the Sabretooth Tigers secretly entered the Lion Temple during Primordium’s siege and stole every last orb of Chi in the Sacred Pool. A combined force of Lions and their allies successfully trapped the Sabretooths in the Throne Room, but they escaped through a secret tunnel and by blasting through the outer wall. No Chi orbs were recovered.
What does this mean for the rest of Chima? According to historical sources, the last time this happened a group of Wolves raided the Sacred Pool during a speedor race outside Lion City. Records from the period indicate it took a long while for the Pool to regenerate enough Chi for the :Lions to resume distribution, so we envision a major shortage of Chi across Chima, though no tribal governments have announced information on any Chi reserves they may have stockpiled.
Historical accounts also indicate we can expect more natural disasters and extreme weather events such as earthquakes and major electrical storms.
Need proper equipment for uncertain times? Shop at New Talon Industries! New Talon Industries offers a range of mechanical gadgets and natural disaster survival kits that can help you to get through these uncertain times. Disclaimer: The Raven Report is sponsored by New Talon Industries. Minor and uniportant disclaimer: NTI takes no responsibility for the effectiveness of items sold by NTI or advised in The Raven Report. All use is at the purchaser’s own risk. Written requests for financial compensation for injuries sustained from use of NTI-sold goods will be shredded.
What happened to Primordium? After half the armies in Chima gathered at Lion City to thwart Galvanor’s attempt at seizing Mount Cavora. Primordium was forced to retreat, and the formerly neutral Bat Tribe officially joined the Chima Alliance. In more recent developments, the Wolf Tribe has removed Lobo from office and reinstated democracy under President Wol’jin, who has rejoined Unichi, whilst King Set-Ra of the Phoenix has withdrawn his tribe from Primordium and resumed Fire Chi shipments to the rest of Chima. With the Croc Tribe having already cut ties with Primordium when the usurper leader Sobek was replaced by the tribe’s rightful rulers, King Crogar and Queen Carina, Primordium is now comprised exclusively of Eagles. Our Lion City correspondent can reveal that a large Chima Alliance force of Lions, Bears and Bats is now moving to besiege the Eagle Spire and arrest Galvanor.
-last edited on May 24, 2022 16:01:42 GMT by Shamrock
Post by Shamrock on May 24, 2022 15:59:37 GMT
Mysterious disappearances continue The Raven Report Previously reported on dozens of people going missing without a trace all across Chima - a phenomenon which has only grown worse since our last issue, with growing numbers from each tribe apparently disappearing into thin air. We hope to have answers by our next issue.
Croc Tribe militarises Passing ship crews have reported a major defence network being built all along the Croc coastline, as well as heavy naval production at their shipyards on Skelekar Island. Are the Crocs just worried about being turned out of their Swamp again, or are they planning an offensive? Nobody knows! And we can only guess what side they’d pick; there are former allies of the Crocs in Primordium (Eagles), Unichi (Scorpions) and the Chima Alliance (Bats) so it’s anybody’s guess what King Crogar is planning.
Could Rica’s reign be nearing an end? The unelected and unpopular Rica, still styling herself “Queen of the Ravens” has grown even more disliked according to completely reliable statistics from the completely unbiased Talon Industries Office of Statistical Affairs, which announced today that 88% of Ravenville citizens now want a change in leadership. Will Rica go willingly, or is another Raven Revolution in the making? Whatever happens, Raven Report subscribers will be the first to hear about it!
Page 2.
Thank you for reading the "Raven Report." Brought to you by New Talon Industries of the Raven Tribe.
Mysterious disappearances continue The Raven Report Previously reported on dozens of people going missing without a trace all across Chima - a phenomenon which has only grown worse since our last issue, with growing numbers from each tribe apparently disappearing into thin air. We hope to have answers by our next issue.
Croc Tribe militarises Passing ship crews have reported a major defence network being built all along the Croc coastline, as well as heavy naval production at their shipyards on Skelekar Island. Are the Crocs just worried about being turned out of their Swamp again, or are they planning an offensive? Nobody knows! And we can only guess what side they’d pick; there are former allies of the Crocs in Primordium (Eagles), Unichi (Scorpions) and the Chima Alliance (Bats) so it’s anybody’s guess what King Crogar is planning.
Could Rica’s reign be nearing an end? The unelected and unpopular Rica, still styling herself “Queen of the Ravens” has grown even more disliked according to completely reliable statistics from the completely unbiased Talon Industries Office of Statistical Affairs, which announced today that 88% of Ravenville citizens now want a change in leadership. Will Rica go willingly, or is another Raven Revolution in the making? Whatever happens, Raven Report subscribers will be the first to hear about it!
Page 2.
Thank you for reading the "Raven Report." Brought to you by New Talon Industries of the Raven Tribe.
I guess Rica's Reign is coming to an end, hopefully Shamrock will respond to that recently-made post somewhere in the Iron Mountains. Seems someone has read the report and has taken matters into his own hands.