M4Jesus said, “Look, M579. I don’t need your help. I need someone to actually help me get out of this mess I’m in.”
“IIIII KNOOOOWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!” M579 said. “YOOOUUUUU NNEEEEEDDD DRINKSSSSSS!!!!! DRINK TIMEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!” he yelled as he pulled a tray of drinks from behind his back and dumped them all over M4Jesus.
M4Jesus cried out as the cold drinks splashed all over him and grabbed a towel. “What were you thinking???????” he yelled at M579.
“IIIIIIII NEEVVVVERRRR THINKS, I’M A FRIIENNNDDDD OF ZAPTY’SSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!”
M4Jesus sighed. “Look, it’s been a bad day already without you here. Are you staying or leaving?”
“III GUESSSSS I’LLLL STAYYYY HEREEEE WITHHHH YOUUUUU! ZAPTY SAYS ‘ME HAVE NO NEED FOR PICKLES, BECAUSE MRS. SKUL DOESN’T LIKE THEM.’ HE SENT YOU SOME PICKLES, AROUND 101 DOZEN, FOR YOU TO HAVE!!!!!!!!!”
M4Jesus bolted up. “Where are they?”
“THEY’RE INNNNN THEEEE TRUCKKK OUT FRONTTTT……”
Racing past M579, M4Jesus threw open the door. There, in front of him, was a huge truck filled with pickles! M4Jesus said, “This is a miracle! Well, that’s one problem down!”
All of a sudden, the truck started rolling down the hill, toward a rushing river. M4Jesus yelled, “Oh, no. Come back!”
M4Jesus ran down the hill after the truck. “I’ll catch that truck if it’s the last thing I do!”
Suddenly, he tripped over a branch, falling headlong into a pond. The truck continued to careen down the hill toward the river.
He got up and looked at the rapidly disappearing vehicle. “I’ll never catch it now. I need a plan, and fast!”
M4Jesus watched as the truck crashed into the river. “Well, now I don’t need a plan.”
All of a sudden, M4Jesus saw a user take a flying leap and jump into the river. “Me save the pie kills!!!!!!!!!!”
Zapty threw all the pickles onto the bank and then climbed up. “You happy now, cool cumber man? I saved all pie kills, you see?”
“Yes, I saw.” M4Jesus said. “That was incredible! How did you do that?”
“It easy for I. Me leap in front of Miss Skul, he good to practice on!”
M4Jesus whistled. “No wonder. Anyway, thanks a lot!”
“You welcome! Zapty will go see if any other innocent cool cumber lovers need help. Bye for now! Superb Zapty away!” And with that, ‘Superb’ Zapty ran off.
M4Jesus began to collect all of the pickles into one pile. “Now, I need some crates!”
From behind him, he heard someone yell, “HERE’SSSS THE GRAPESSSS YOUUUU NEEDDDDD!!!!!!” M4Jesus turned around and fell backwards as he was pummeled with bunches of grapes.
M4Jesus turned on M579. “I need crates, not grapes! Get out of here!!!!!!”
“YOUUUUU GOTTTT ITTTT!!!!!” M579 strode off.
“All I have to worry about now a taking care of a pickle lawsuit.” M4Jesus said.
The user started laughing. “You must be M4Jesus. I’m A_Grue. You know, kinda like the grue in the video game?”
M4Jesus stared blankly at him. “Never mind.” A_Grue continued. “Dinosaur told me about you. Said he ‘loves throwing pies at him.’ Ha ha ha! Anyway, how can I help you?”
Muttering under his breath, M4Jesus said, “Could you show me where the courtroom is? I have to settle a pickle matter with another user.”
“Sure, follow me! I love that courtroom. Sorta dark. I like dark. Do you?”
M4Jesus shook his head.
“Well, that’s okay. Most people don’t. Anyway, here’s the courtroom! Hope you have an enjoyable day here!” And with that, A_Grue strode back to his desk.
Opening the door, M4Jesus peeked inside. Dark and gloomy, with a few fluorescent lights hanging above the seats, it was not the place you would want to spend a whole day.
Suddenly, M4Jesus heard voices at the other end of the room. “Look, we’ll win this case easy! The judge doesn’t even like pickles, and most of the jury is made up of pickle haters. Just relax!”
“I can never relax when someone is late.” The other voice said. “That M4Jesus is exactly 52 seconds late, and time never waits!”
M4Jesus stepped inside. “Hello! I’m here!”
“Finally!” Snickers6461 said. “You are exactly 56 seconds late. You need to work on your arrival time.”
Taking his seat, M4Jesus felt very nervous. This was his first big court date, and he did not want to let his pickles down!
All of a sudden, the judge arrived. “Court is now in session.” He said as he took his seat. The juries shuffled in and sat down with much scratching of chairs on the floor.
M4Jesus looked at Snickers6361 and his lawyer. It was only then when he realized that the lawyer was Skul!
The judge said, “Now, the prosecutor will make his statements. Proceed.”
Skul cleared his throat. “Ladies and gentlemen of the jury. As you all know, our cyberspace town has always been a peaceful, fun loving community. We have always enjoyed coming together and talking about one thing: Legos!
Now, the defendant, M4Jesus, has come to our community, making it less safe to live. His pickles have destroyed the imaginary taste buds of our fair city, and have ravaged the countryside by using up all the good, unreal soil!
Are we going to continue on with this? No! I say today, because of the user I am representing, Snickers6361, that we close down M4Jesus’s pickle/cucumber shop this very afternoon. Those, ladies and gentlemen of the jury, are my remarks.”
“Thank you, Skul.” The judge said. “And now, the defense will present their remarks. Proceed.”
M4Jesus stood up and gulped. “Um, well, I didn’t really have a speech, but I just wanted to say that I love pickles and they should always be around for the next generation of users. Please don’t close me down. That’s it.”
The judge turned to the jury. “You have heard the testimonies of both the defense and the prosecution. Now, you must make a decision as to whether the specified user, M4Jesus, should keep his shop or not. You have 15 minutes. Court is adjourned until then.”
The juries filed out.
Snickers6361 and Skul started talking amongst themselves. “Good job, Skul! I am sure we have won this case to the best of our ability.”
M4Jesus looked at the jury. One of them winked at him. “Don’t worry, cool cumber man, it will all turn out fine.” M4Jesus gaped.
Disguised under the huge wig, Zapty was grinning down at him as he filed out. “I sure hope I get to keep my shop!” M4Jesus said. Zapty nodded at him.
“Me know ways to get jury to want pickles!” he said as he walked into the next room.
M4Jesus, Skul, and Snickers6361 waited for what seemed like hours. Finally, the juries showed back up, looking exhausted and had bruises all over them. Zapty had a triumphant smile on his face.
“We have made our decision. We pronounce that M4Jesus should keep his store, stock, and property. That’s all.” And with that, the juries left the room.
‘Court dismissed!” the judge yelled as he banged his gavel.
That night, M4Jesus gave the 100 dozen pickles to Golden. “Thanks a lot, M4Jesus!” Golden said as he drove away.
“You’re welcome!” M4Jesus yelled as he went back inside. “Not a bad day at court, I might add!” he told his cucumbers.
Special Episode Between Seasons: Cucumber Liquidation Sale!
(Just so you all know, the last episode was the end of Season 1. This is a special, one part episode that is between Season 1 and Season 2. I hope you enjoy! )
M4Jesus hung up a huge sign in front of his store. It read:
HUGE CUCUMBER LIQUIDATION SALE! ALL MUST GO! SALE ENDS TODAY AT 4! COME NOW!
Soon, some users came along. “I am so excited about buying all his stock!” Skul said. “Then he will be forced out of business.”
“Me want cool cumbers, me want cool cumbers!” Zapty chanted.
M579 said, “I am SOOOOOOOO happy about getting more cucumbers!”
“Yeah, me too!” Dwarfy said.
“Can I borrow Zapty today?” WaveViper asked.
“Is there any tea?” LCM asked no one in particular.
“I sure hope there are stories to be read!” Brickgirl said.
“Are there such things as cucumber popsicles?” MJLaubcher asked.
Soon, M4Jesus opened the doors and brought out a huge stand. “Come here, one and all!”
The users surged forward and saw….. a huge cucumber water stand!
“I thought you were having a cucumber liquidation sale! Where are the cucumbers?” Skul asked.
M4Jesus smiled proudly, holding up a glass. “I have liquefied the cucumbers, and I am having a huge sale! My cucumber liquidation sale!”
The users groaned. “Of course!” Dwarfy said. “Why didn’t I think of that?”
Season 2, Episode 1: Zapty – Professional Scarecrow
Part 1
M4Jesus hung up the “OPEN” sign in his store window and unlocked the door. “I sure hope this is a quiet day,” he thought, “because the past few days haven’t!”
Almost immediately, the door swung open. M4Jesus looked up to see a panting Skul holding Zapty by the arm.
"M4Jesus, can you please take Zapty? I have some important people coming to the hotel and I want to get him out of my hair." Skul asked.
M4Jesus looked at the grinning Zapty. "I guess so!"
"Me happy to help!" Zapty said as he juggled some cucumbers.
“Zapty, put those down!” Skul said. He smiled guiltily at M4Jesus. “Thanks!” He flung Zapty’s arm down and raced out the door.
M4Jesus glanced at Zapty. “So, what can you do?”
Zapty pondered the question. “Well… me able to eat cool cumbers!”
“Anything else?”
Zapty furrowed his brow. “Me know how to annoy Mrs. Skul! Uh…. me know how to destroy things!” He glanced at M4Jesus.
“No.” M4Jesus shook his head. “Is there anything else at all?”
“Me ran hotel once!”
M4Jesus smiled. “Yes, that will work. Okay, I need to go out to my cucumber patch and see how they are doing. You can stay here and watch the shop.”
M4Jesus walked outside to his cucumber patch and started tending the vegetables.
Fifteen minutes later, he heard angry voices inside the shop. That doesn’t sound good, M4Jesus thought as he ran inside.
He threw open the door and gaped at what he saw inside. Cucumbers and pickles alike were strewn about all over the store, and four angry users were chasing a terrified Zapty.
“I want a total and irrefutable refund!” Snickers6361 yelled when he saw M4Jesus. “I asked politely for some chicken salad, and I got pickle salad!”
“Yeah, me too!” WaveViper said. “I wanted some cucumber soup, and I got a can of crushed pickles!”
All of a sudden, M4Jesus was covered in a liquid pie. “What’s your problem?” he asked Dinosaur.
“I wanted more pies, and Zapty gave me a ‘grow your own cucumbers’ guide!” Dinosaur said.
A_Grue cut in, “I asked if I could scare him, and he said ‘me not know!’”
M4Jesus covered his ears and turned to Zapty. “What happened????????” he yelled above the racket.
Zapty gave him a sheepish grin. “Me wanted to be helpful! Me not do so well,” he said as he looked at the outraged users yelling at him.
“So, what are you going to do about it?” Dinosaur yelled.
M4Jesus yelled in his deepest voice, “QUIET!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”
At once, the users calmed down.
“Now, I am very sorry this happened. I’ll give you a refund, but please, just get out of here!”
The users grumbled as they received their money and left the store.
M4Jesus turned on Zapty. “What will I do with you?”
Zapty shrugged. “Me not know, Senor M4.”
“I know!” M4Jesus said as he pulled Zapty outside.
“It feel good up here, cool cumber man!” Zapty said as he dangled from a pole above M4Jesus’ cucumber patch.
“I’m glad, Zapty!” M4Jesus said as he admired his work. “You make a really good professional scarecrow.”
Soon, Skul walked into the shop, looking around. “Hey, M4Jesus. I need Zapty back. His parents need him to help them do their laundry, and I can’t find him. Where is he?”
M4Jesus pointed out the store window. “There he is!”
Skul looked out and saw Zapty’s parents tugging Zapty down from the pole and come charging in.
“I’m sorry, Zapty’s parents, but it’s not my fault!” Skul stuttered hopelessly.
“What have you done to my sweet little Zapty?” Zapty’s mother said as she dragged Skul out of the store.
RING! RING! RING! M4Jesus rolled over in his bed. “What is it? I like cucumbers… how’s yours……” he said sleepily into the phone.
“Mine are fine.” The male voice said. “This is the LEGO MB Zoo. We just wanted to inform you that a dangerous tiger has escaped and is on the loose and has been sighted in your area. Please take caution.”
“Thank you….” M4Jesus mumbled, “Sweet dreams….” He slammed the phone down and rolled back over.
All of a sudden, his eyes popped open. “A tiger? Loose! In my area? Help!!!!!!” He immediately jumped out of bed and got dressed.
Several hours later, at daybreak…… KNOCK! KNOCK! M4Jesus stood at the door, poised and ready. “Come in!” he said in a shaky voice.
The door creaked open. M4Jesus pulled a lever, and a huge can of pickles spilled all over the user.
“Oh, my shirt! My hair! What have you done?” The picklefied starwarsgirl said.
M4Jesus stood frozen. “Uh…. I’m sorry….”
“I’m sure you’re sorry! I came to buy some cucumbers for my party, and look at the welcome I get! Hmmph!” And with that, starwarsgirl spun on her heel and left the store.
M4Jesus shook himself, as if he was in a daze. “I totally did not expect that.”
Resetting his pickle trap, M4Jesus decided to get some much needed rest. Soon, he was fast asleep.
All of a sudden, M4Jesus heard a loud scratching on the front door of the cucumber store.
His head jerked up. He raced to the front door, just in time to see slowly swing open.
“ROAR!!!!!!!!!!!”
M4Jesus jumped. “Ah!!!!!!!!!!!!! Help!!!! It’s that tiger!” He climbed up onto the front counter.
The door creaked open, and M4Jesus saw the shadow of a tiger on the floor. “Someone, anyone? Help!” he squeaked.
Suddenly, the tiger sprang into the room. Taking a look around, it immediately started tearing the shop to pieces. Pickles flew, cucumbers splatted on the floor, and M4Jesus was terrified.
“You stop that right now, you hear?” he told the tiger. “I’ve got a deadly weapon! Stay back!” M4Jesus held up a mop and started hitting the tiger on the head with it.
The tiger started squeaking, then moaning, then started saying, “Hey, quit that!”
M4Jesus stood straight up. “Am I hearing things, or did that tiger just talk?” He dropped the mop on the floor.
Almost immediately, the tiger pounced on it and picked it up in its hand.
All of a sudden, the tiger reached up and pulled its mask off.
“Huh?” M4Jesus said.
The tiger started laughing. “Ha, ha ha! I’m T1ggrr.” T1ggrr extended his hand.
M4Jesus looked at it as if it was from outer space. “Um….. hi.” He said.
“I bought this tiger suit for St. Patricks Day, but it didn’t work out. I wanted to see if it really could scare someone, so here I am!”
Getting only a blank stare, T1ggrr continued. “No hard feelings, I hope.” They both surveyed the huge mess. “Well, it was nice scaring you! Bye!” T1ggrr walked out of the store.
M4Jesus stared after him. Suddenly, the phone started ringing. Reaching over, M4Jesus brought it to his ear. “Yes?”
“Hello, again! This is the MB Zoo. We just wanted to tell you that the tiger has been captured, and no further action is needed. Thank you for your cooperation!” the user hung up.
“You’re welcome….” M4Jesus said. He looked at the huge disaster of his store. “I’m going to need some help to pick this up.” He grabbed the phone and dialed a number. “Hello Skul? Yes, could I borrow Zapty for a couple of hours?”
(By the way, just in case you don’t get the title, it’s a play off of the French phrase for a good appetite, which is bon appétit.)
Part 1:
M4Jesus pushed a button on his phone. “I’m getting pretty good at this LEGO City game!” he said.
Suddenly, his phone started ringing. “Hello?”
“Hey, M4Jesus, this is Skul! How are you doing today?” MB crickets chirped.
“Doing great, I guess!” Skul said. “How would you like to take Zapty for little while? He is really hungry, and I know just what he likes!”
More crickets chirped. “Cool cumbers, I guess?” M4Jesus said.
Skul coughed. “Yep, that’s correct! Anyway, thank you so much, M4Jesus! I’ll drop him off in about 10 seconds.”
M4Jesus looked out his cucumber store’s front window. There was Skul, who was standing outside with his ear on his smartphone. Zapty waved.
“See you later!” With that, Skul shut his phone down and ran off toward the hotel.
Zapty stood in the doorway. “Hello again, cool cumber man! Me hungry today! Me see what we have here.” He picked up a jar of pickles. “Pickle delite, those be very good…”
“Look Zapty,” M4Jesus said, “I don’t have time to help you pick out your favorite pickles. I’ve got some serious work to do!”
“Okay, cool cumber man, I pick out on my own! You go work.” Zapty said.
M4Jesus nodded and slipped back into the back room. At last, I can get back to this game! He thought.
Several hours later, M4Jesus rose from the chair. “Boy, my back hurts!” he said.
Suddenly, he heard a heard a huge sound of chewing in the front room. “Oh no. Oh no!” he yelled as he raced to the front.
His eyes were met with a horrible sight. Zapty sat in the middle of a huge pile of empty cucumber crates and spotless pickle jars and was licking his lips.
“Them very good, cool cumber man!” Zapty said as he patted his stomach.
M4Jesus stared at him. “What... have… you… done?” he said as he saw the empty shelves.
“I so hungry, me ate all them!”
“I can see that!” M4Jesus said. “Now what am I supposed to do?”
Zapty pondered the question. “Call my mother? That what me always do!”
“No, that will probably not work.” M4Jesus said.
“Run from Skul? That what always happens.”
M4Jesus sighed. “No, that is not what I am going to do. Well, first things first, you’re going to have to clean this mess up.”
