Chapter 16: Childhood
“Hi-yugh! Yargh!” Andrew shouted angrily, stabbing the dark grey punching bag with a long metal rod.
“You are trying to defeat your opponent into submission, not fatally wound him.” Wu stated.
Andrew gave the bag one hard hit and turned around to face Wu. “Why can’t I-”
The punching bag quickly swung back and bumped into Andrew, making him stumble, landing upon his hands and knees. “Ow.” He muttered.
“‘Why can’t you wound him,’ were you beginning to ask?” Wu questioned. “We do not fight these wars for the intent of harming others. Fighting is our way of protecting the citizens of Ninjago by fending off the villains. A warrior does not strike with hate and anger, they do it for love.”
Andrew looked up at Wu suspiciously. “Love?! You beat up snake-people for love?!”
“For our love for Ninjago and its people. Now – again; this time with less anger.”
Andrew groaned. “We’ve been training all day! Can’t I have a break?!”
“Battles have been frequent; we need all the training we can get. Presumably, the Anacondrai warriors should arrive in Ninjago soon, and we must protect the people – for love. To do so, we must be in our peak physical condition.”
“When am I ever going to get time to just be a kid?”
Lloyd suddenly perked up from the corner of the dojo and ran over to Wu and Andrew. “We should give him a break.”
Wu gave Lloyd a curious look. “And for what reason, Lloyd?”
“He-he needs to savor his childhood.” Lloyd stated slightly sheepishly; knowing the statement may sound slightly odd.
“I am not taking away his childhood, if that is what you mean to insinuate. He will still have time to-”
“How do we know that?! How do we know it won’t end suddenly?!”
“I believe you are referring to the Grundle incident. I can assure you, such an event will not-”
“We can’t be sure! You told me I’d have plenty of time as well, but I didn’t! We need to indulge the time we have now.
“I mean, there’s not a single person in this room who doesn’t wish their childhood went differently! You know my childhood was hard, being frequently betrayed by the snakes and seeing such precious time vanish suddenly. Nya wanted to have a normal childhood with her parents, yet she and Kai were stuck trying to fend for themselves at the Blacksmith’s shop for over ten years! Also, Jay resented the mockery and scorn from his peers, as they made fun of him for living at a-”
“Actually,” Jay interrupted. “My childhood was great! The junkyard was a play-place full of possibilities! I remember finding an old map amongst the trash, and for two weeks straight I acted like a pirate, despite the many times my parents told me to knock it off!” He laughed. “‘But pirates don’t have bedtimes!’” He imitated in a squeaky voice.
“Oh. Well, that makes one of us.” Lloyd said. “Still, most of us had poor childhoods – including you.”
Wu raised his eyebrow, interested.
“You wished you could have a life without the guilt of what happened to Garmadon.” Lloyd stated.
Wu’s face was unreadable. Andrew may have detected a glimpse of sorrow and regret in his eyes, but still wasn’t sure. Finally, Wu sighed. “Fine. He can be free.”
Andrew skipped to his bedroom with Lloyd. “Thanks, Lloyd!” He said happily. “You’re the best!”
He swung open the door to the ninja’s bedroom, grabbed a black video-game controller from beside the television, then sat upon the bed. The screen suddenly turned on, showing a logo which read “Bricktendo.”
“What are you doing?” Lloyd asked, confused.
“Playing video games, of course!” Andrew declared. “C’mere, you can play GLa-”
Lloyd suddenly unplugged the television from the outlet in the wall. “What was that for?!” Andrew whined.
“Before these things were invented, kids used something called ‘imagination. C’mon, let’s do something outside.”
“But there’s nothing to do outside. There’s nothing cool, like a slide, trampoline, treehouse, or-”
“Let’s build a treehouse!” Lloyd suggested.
Andrew paused. “What? Really?”
“Yeah! We’ve got the materials; we’ve got the time! C’mon, let’s do it!”

A couple hours later, an area right next to the temple was covered in spilled paint, random wooden boards, cups full of nails and random tools. A large room which was built with white boards boasted several feet high into the tree, with a long ladder hanging from it.
“How’re things looking up there?” Lloyd asked.
“Pretty great!” Andrew responded from atop the treehouse. “The pull-up ladder is working well! I still wish we could add more booby traps, though.”
Lloyd laughed. “Hey, we can’t make this TOO awesome. One time I made an epic treehouse with a ton of booby traps, but THESE guys had to destroy it.”
“Woah, woah-woah-woah-woah-woah!” Jay shouted, carrying two buckets of red paint towards the treehouse. “You’re not telling the full story! Lloyd was working with the Serpentine – we thought it must’ve been some kind of snake base, which is why we destroyed it – and not without heroic risk, too!”
“You worked for the Serpentine?!” Andrew laughed in disbelief.
Lloyd gave a small smile, although a trace of regret was seen in his eyes. “Yeah, I did.” He admitted. “I wasn’t raised very well – thankfully, Wu kindly took me in and led me onto the correct path.”
“Ha!” Jay chuckled. “Now you say he ‘kindly took you in;’ at first you couldn’t stop complaining about how we took you as our ‘prisoner!’”
Lloyd gave Jay a playful shove. “Why do you always have to ruin everything?!” He joked.
The tall oak doors of the temple swung open as Nya walked out, holding a cardboard box. She swung her head to the area of the construction, and nearly dropped her box in surprise. “What are you doing?!” She asked in confusion.
“We’re building a treehouse! It’s gonna be epic!” Jay declared. “Er, for Andrew, I mean.”
“I just put on the last coat of paint.” Lloyd stated. “What do you think?”
Nya stared at the treehouse. “I think . . . I think . . .”
Andrew looked at Nya, awaiting her reply. “. . . I think it needs beanbags!” She declared.
Lloyd laughed. “Lots and lots of beanbags!” She continued. “This needs to be a beanbag paradise – with a comic book shelf!”
A little while later, the ninja relaxed happily in their wooden wonderland. Comic books were scattered upon the ground, as well as many popped corn kernels (Jay had dumped a bowl of popcorn over Lloyd). Andrew flipped happily through his Starfarer comic. “This is the life!” He thought.
Jay suddenly put down his comic and stood up from his beanbag, stepping upon popcorn, making them crunch. “I’m going to go get something real quick. Be right back!”
“Okay, bye!” Nya said.
A minute or two later, Jay burst out of the temple doors, holding something in his hand. Suddenly, the object flashed. Jay had taken a photo of the ninja lounging in the treehouse. “Jay!” Lloyd reprimanded, laughing. “Delete that photo now! No way can anybody see that!”
“Nuh-uh!” Jay declined. The ninja and Andrew jumped from their beanbags and hopped out of the treehouse, beginning to chase Jay around the temple, laughing and yelling like small children.

* * * * * * * * * * * *

“I hope you enjoyed your frolic.” Sensei Wu stated.
The ninja were sweating, panting heavily, and still lightly giggling. “Still got the photo.” Jay said with a grin.
Lloyd looked up at Wu with a joking smile. “We were training! Testing our agility!”
Nya laughed. “What’s for dinner?” Andrew asked.
He was secretly hoping it was the cooking night for one of the absent ninja. The ninja always tried to make gross stuff, like asparagus fondue or squash stew, and when they did try to make good food, it would always turn out disgusting. Cole’s spaghetti sauce turned out to be a bunch of rotten tomatoes, and Kai’s roast chicken had never been plucked, resulting in the smoke alarm wailing for the next eight minutes until Nya finally found a way to shut it off. When the ninja were gone, they had no other choice to just make sandwiches or bowls of cereal.
“I think it’s your night.” Lloyd said.
Andrew almost gasped in fear. He didn’t want to cook! Nevertheless, Andrew still ended up in the kitchen, forced to create some kind of meal. Andrew looked around. What could he make? Suddenly, inspiration hit.

“Bowl of Yum”
Recipe by: Andrew
Serves: However many ninja live in your temple
Cook Time: probably about 10 minutes or something
INGREDIENTS:
• A cup of gummy bears
• ½ cup of saltwater taffy
• A bowl of marshmallows
• Four bars of chocolate
• Lots of Caramel
• Two slices of cake (that’s all there was in the pantry)
• A pack of cookies
• A tub of ice cream
• Three cups of candy corn
• Five cups of sugar won’t hurt
DIRECTIONS:
Combine all ingredients into large pot, and turn stove temperature all the way up. Constantly stir as the ingredients melt into some gooey, light brown sludge. Pour into separate bowls. Use gummy worm as garnish. Enjoy!
The ninja, Misako and Wu could not stop staring at the bowls in front of them. “Eat up!” Andrew encouraged.
Not wanting to hurt his feelings, they began trying to eat some, except for Nya, who declared she “wasn’t hungry,” despite stating she was famished earlier. Misako stuck in a spoon in attempt to eat a serving, yet when she tried to pull it back up, it stayed stuck inside the bowl. She held the bowl to the table in one hand, and began yanking the spoon upward, but was unsuccessful in retrieving her silverware. Lloyd tried to lift up a bit with a fork, but the fork slipped and sunk into the gooey mess. Jay stabbed the food repeatedly with his knife. Wu ignored the bowl and took a sip of his tea.
Andrew somehow managed to get a serving onto his spoon, and took a bit. He suddenly spat it back into is bowl. “Blegh!” He shouted. “That’s disgusting! Ugh! It’s putrid!”
Looking at the others at the table, he said, “You don’t have to eat any if you don’t want to. I’m going to get some cereal.”
The ninja sighed with relief as Andrew walked to the pantry fetched a box of Dareth Puffs. Jay discreetly tossed his bowl out of the window when Andrew was facing away.

Chapter 17: Chen Chatter
A large array of noises echoed from the dojo down below. Wu walked downstairs to see the three remaining ninja training – hitting punch bags, jumping around obstacle courses, sword-fighting dummies, and whatever they could to stay in shape. Even Andrew was training. Aggressive shouts were heard as the clanging of the equipment echoed up the stairs. Lloyd stepped away from his dummy to address the team. “The Anacondrai are sure to attack next.” He stated firmly. “The villains have begun to pick us off, one by one. We need to stay in unity, otherwise, there will be no team left.”
“Right.” Jay said, kicking the punching bag. “And how do we do that?”
“I dunno.” Lloyd admitted. “Maybe we hold hands?”
“That’d be awkward.” Andrew noted.
Lloyd said. “Look, whatever we do, we just have to stay together. None of us split up to fight other villains. I know it will take much longer to bring them down, but we’ll be stronger, and we’ll stay one team.”
“Lloyd, don’t get me wrong, but I feel like we’re underestimating the danger.” Nya said. “I mean, sure we took down the others easily enough, but the Anacondrai? Last time it took every elemental master in Ninjago, and even then we couldn’t win until Sensei Garmadon – paid the price.”
Lloyd looked at the ground regretfully, understanding. “I see what you mean.” He told her. “But it’s our only shot. We have to take a chance. Unless we had some way to control the army, like the Helmet of Shadows, I don’t think we-”
“Hey,” Jay thought. “I think we do have something that can control the army!”
The other ninja looked at Jay in surprise. “Really?!” Andrew asked in disbelief. “What?!”

* * * * * * * * * * * *

Annoying bouncy music played softly from the stereos, covering the sounds of clicking chopsticks and a conveyor belt moving food slowly. Several people sat at booths, enjoying the savory delight of the slightly spicy noodles. Suddenly, the ninja burst through the door.
“Hello, welcome to Master Chen’s, Ninjago’s number-two noodle house.” Skylor said dryly from the counter. “Can I get you any—wait, the ninja?”
“Hi, Skylor.” Lloyd greeted. “Where can we find Chen?”
Skylor gestured behind her, where two white doors stood before the steaming kitchen. “He’s back there.” She informed them. “Is something up?”
The ninja didn’t respond and walked quickly towards the kitchen, but Andrew replied helpfully, “Well, our team continually gets fatally injured and some of the most fearsome villains Ninjago has ever known are probably going to attack soon and possibly destroy the world as we know it, but we might have it under control; I dunno.”
Skylor stared at him in shock. She began to ask more, but Andrew quickly joined the others in the kitchen.
“What a cute, delicate creature.” Chen cooed.
He stood by the oven, where a large pot was boiling. He stroked a brown lobster lovingly. “What a cute thing. You, Larry the Lobster, are very sweet, and you deserve nothing but the best.”
He looked at the ceiling thoughtfully, then stared back down at the lobster. “However, it’s a cruel world.”
He abruptly tossed the lobster into the boiling pot. Water splashed out onto the stove. Chen began cackling. “BOIL, LARRY, BOIL!” He screamed. “How you like THAT sauna?!”
Jay coughed and spoke up. “Uh, we’d like to-”
Chen turned around. “Oh, you guys.” He said. “I’m not doing any evil! Can’t you trust me to-”
“We’re not here for that.” Lloyd stated. “Jay, you tell him.”
“Right.” Jay confirmed. “As you know, a bunch of old armies have been returning to Ninjago, and we think the Anacondrai are coming next.”
“My army!” Chen gasped.
“Now, you want to return to a normal and good lifestyle, right?”
“I think I know where this is going . . .” Chen declared. “You want me to fight my own army?!”
“Well, sort of.” Nya admitted. “We want you to convince the army not to fight, and to return to the Cursed Realm. I mean, you have the most influence over the army.”
“I won’t do it!” Chen decided firmly, crossing his arms. “I’m already starting things with a clean slate, I have no need to look back on the past!”
“Actually,” Lloyd began. “You’re still evil, according to government laws. You have still earned another forty years in Kryptarium due to illegal slavery and declaring war against Ninjago – and you’re getting off pretty easily, I’d say. However, the governor said he’d be willing to wipe your slate clean if you’d do this for Ninjago.”
Chen thought with concern for a few minutes, then sighed. “You all are a bunch of noodle-brains. Fine, I’ll do it.” He said.

* * * * * * * * * * * *

“So . . . where and when do they come?” Nya asked.
“I don’t know.” Lloyd admitted.
“You mean they could end up attacking the temple in three days?!” Jay asked. “Are you serious?! How long are we gonna wait, and how will we know when it happens?! Did you really-”
“Zane!” Andrew suddenly gasped.
The ninja turned their heads to see a small white figure running down the other side of the street, across Chen’s noodle house. He held something in his right hand. “Zane!” The ninja shouted joyfully.
They ran over across the street to him, ready to embrace him in a warm, thankful hug, but a moment before they did, Zane suddenly pushed them stumbling onto their backs with a swift jerk of his metal arm. “Move aside, foolish ninja.” He instructed with a dark tone.
Lloyd sat up slowly and rubbed his head where he had fallen. “Wait, Zane, what are you doing?! Don’t you recognize it’s us?”
Zane turned around slowly. His eyes glowed a suspenseful red. “Of course I do.” He declared. “Which is why I’m doing – this.”
At the final word, a blast of freezing air shot out of his hand and hit the ninja, freezing them into a large, clear cube of ice. Muffled screeches emitted from the block. Zane turned back around and continued walking, then pulled out the object he was carrying – the Realm Crystal. The Crystal gleamed in the sunlight as he lifted it towards the sky. A great beam of light shot out towards the sky, and a large blue portal suddenly open from above. Green, glowing, transparent Anacondrai warriors floated out of the rift and onto the Ninjago surface. “We are back, Ninjago!” Chope declared with a laugh once his ghostly body hit the ground.
“Hey!” Kapau reprimanded. “I wanted to be the one to say that!”
“Well, it’s too late now. I said it.”
“Why couldn’t I have said it?!”
“Because I already did. It’s too late. Sorry.”
“You’re not sorry! I wanted to say it!”
“Fine, fine! Say it, then.”
“No, it’s too late.”
“It’s not too late!”
“Yes, it is!”
“How would you know?”
“You said it yourself!”
“I didn’t!”
“Yes, you did!”
“When?”
“When I asked why I couldn’t say it, you said “I already did; it’s too late.’”
“I don’t remember that.”
“That’s because you’re-”
“How about we just say it together?”
“Well, I guess.”
“You ready!”
“We are back, Ni-!”
“Hey, not now! We’re supposed to do it together!”
“Well, then when are we supposed to do it?”
“When I say ‘three.’”
“Okay.”
“One . . . two . . . fo-”
“We are b-!”
“Not now!”
“You said ‘on three!’”
“Yeah! I was about to say ‘four!’”
“No, three comes after two! You don’t know how to count!”
“It was a joke!”
“You’re a joke.”
“Okay, whatever; we’ll try again, but for real this time.”
“Only if I count.”
“Fine.”
“One . . . two . . . three!”
The two Anacondrai shouted in union: “We are back, Nin—AUGH!!”
A woman in a yellow cloak ran through the ghostly pair, heading towards a dumpy shop downtown. “Ugh, that felt weird.” Kapau said.
“Yeah. I hate it when people walk through us.” Chope agreed.
“Still, we were so scary, that woman went running away from her shop! That’s pretty cool!”
“Yeah! This is gonna be great! Now, where are those ninja?”
“I think they’re right over there.” Kapau gestured to the large ice block.
The block had since begun to melt, and the tops of their heads (except Andrew’s) began to poke out from the cube. One of the ghost Anacondrai hit the block with his sword, and it rolled down the road. The Anacondrai began to laugh the ninja’s unfortunate expense.
A couple of them soon noticed a figure covered in pieces of metal walking up the road, holding a shuriken-like weapon. The person jumped into a bush at the side of the rode. The Anacondrai who saw it shrugged it off. “Now, what do we do now?” Kapau wondered. “Maybe we should find the other ninja and finish off them or something?”
Suddenly, something hit Chope in the head, knocking him to the ground before he vanished into a cloud of green smoke. That “something” was Skylor, covered in dark Deepstone armor, holding an aeroblade in each hand with a determined look in her eyes. The ghostly Anacondrai slithered toward her, but she leapt into the air, kicking several into the face as they, too, vanished into smoke.
More of the dangerous snakes began circling onto her. Skylor swung at one with a swipe of the aeroblade, punched another in the stomach, then tossed an aeroblade right at one. She struck the ground with an areoblade, then pushed off it and swung around, kicking several Anacondrai upside the chin, as they too, puffed into smoke clouds.
One Anacondrai remained upon the open road. It turned around to look at Skylor. With a squeal, it ran back to the portal and floated up inside it.
Suddenly, a purple figure jumped out of the noodle house. “Heeeeeeeeeere’s Chenny!” Master Chen shouted, covered in purple makeup and wearing a fake Anacondrai tail.
He looked upon the empty road, where no Anacondrai were to be seen. “Hey, where’d everyone go?!” He asked.

Poor mods.

Yes, I checked out the TPC website.  Nice comics, by the way.
(Yes!  And I'm planning on writing a book too!  . . . in a couple of decades.)

Great again!  I want some asparagus fondue.  Sounds yummy.